The other day I saw one of those snapshots of a post on one social media platform posted to a different platform. It was about priorities, and it’s been stuck in my head since then.
I say things live on the back burner of my mind, simmering until I’m ready to write or post them. This one was bubbling away cheerfully on the front burner, reminding me that I’d best get it written down before it bubbled over.
The post spoke of how people have their top three priorities, and how the OP had learned to look at viral posts and influencers and even friends through a lens of identifying what their top priorities were. That fitness influencer whose business is being in great shape and cooking elaborate, healthy meals? Fitness and food are among their top three priorities. The minimalism or house fixing person whose room is spotless and organized? That person prioritizes cleaning and repairs and upgrades. Writers who put in multiple hours in a day? Have made writing one of their top three priorities.
There’s no point in being jealous of that perfect body, or clean hour, or word count if those aren’t your top priorities.
And if you want one of those? You need to make that thing a top priority.
OP concluded that it inspired them to make writing a priority, even if it didn’t become one of their top three, and that helped their attitude toward writing. At least, I think I’m remembering the conclusion correctly.
As is obvious from the bubbling simmering pot on my mental front burner, I’ve been thinking about this ever since.
Because I was left with one really important (to me) question: HOW????
It’s the same kind of thing I thought while attempting to work through writing advice books. Are there people who are actually in control of their lives, time, and priorities? Are there people who can say “writing is more important than…”?
I often say writing is like breathing; I can’t live without it, even though sometimes it feels impossible to do (hello dramatic sinuses and lack of time).
But even though writing is so necessary for my mental health, and as much as I would love to say it’s my top priority… I don’t have that luxury.
When I try to identify my top priorities, I come up with…
- Family (elderly parents, spouse, kids)
- Health (kind of need it to be here and alive and working, right?)
- Income (housing, food, clothing, security)
Those are absolutely the top three—and not a one of them is under my control. Sure, maybe writing could be a source of income, but it wouldn’t give anywhere near the security that my current day job provides, particularly where insurance is concerned.
Those priorities take up a lot of my time and all of them come with a mental load as well. Plus, they each have many parts, right? Health includes exercise, medications, eating properly, taking time to relax/destress, and sleep hygiene. The day job is technically 40 hours out of the week, but there’s getting ready, getting home, and decompression time, plus I’m in IT which means there are things that have to be done outside of normal hours. Family is, well, family. Things come up and everything else is dropped. I am very thankful to work at a day job that does allow me to roll with those punches; not sure I would’ve survived the last few years without that!
Saying “make writing the fourth priority” sounds simple, until time is factored in. Writing is the first priority I choose—the others are built into life. But there is so little time left over after those, and so little mental capability, and so so much to do.
Writing is, after all, a dozen jobs in a trench coat.
At the same time, thinking about it this week has forced me to step back and take a look at things. I started the year off organized and getting shit done. It all fell apart in the second quarter, and here I am in the fourth quarter trying to drag everything back into line.
Maybe it’ll work, even.
The thing I’m getting at is that choosing top priorities requires some kind of privilege, some ability for someone else to take on the responsibility of other priorities, or those priorities simply not existing (or being able to be ignored) for a person.
When I retire, my day job will be writing. That’ll be it. But not yet, not now. When that happens, it’ll be my normal top priority.
For now, coming in fourth, it gets squoze in around other obligations.
For example, while I was writing this post, I interrupted myself with a phone call (family), and a text (family), and checking an email (after work hours day job obligation)—I’m trying to squeeze in writing and potentially posting this in a 45 minute window after work, a light dinner, and PT (health) and before going to kick things (TKD is absolutely health, both physical and mental).
On the other hand, I’m feeling really good about the fact that I have managed to wrangle enough brain for words to make sense, and to draft a post. I prioritized writing instead of letting my brain rest while I watch anime!
We’ll see if I can keep this up. Meanwhile, it’s already later than I expected as I finish drafting, so I’m going to save editing for later so I can clean up, shut this computer down, and ensure I get out the door on time. Nothing is ever so simple as do, edit, post, done any more.
Take care, all.
And while we’re here, what are your priorities, and are they your own or are they outside of your control?